Twitterjaya...

It's what Malaysian call the Twitter in Malaysia. Kinda like Malaysian Twitter Community kinda thing. It's new to me because I haven't been on Twitter for a year and half or so. Now I'm just starting back again, I got to catch up with oh so many things.

Actually, I wanna talk about someone I know who's on Twitter. His name is Faliq Fahmi. He is extremely famous Twitter in Malaysia to be honest. got some 20,000+ followers and growing every single day. To anyone who knows him, would probably understand why people like him so much, but to those who don't, I think by following him you would understand why he's so interesting.

For me, he's kinda remind me of a a book. A romantic novel more like it. His tweets are usually about relationships, broken hearts and love. Mostly. But he's a joker too. Not to mention has a lot of charm and that I guess is what attract women to him. I think that what makes him so interesting. He always know what to say and his tweets are never boring. That is why people always retweet whatever he said. Because most of what he said, is what we think and feel or want to think or feel all along but he put it in a much very savvy and sophisticated like sentence. Which why I also like to retweet most what he said. =P Guilty.

Even though I know him back when I was in University and truth to be told, we're never that close. We're more like an acquaintance. So, I guess it is kind of expected that he never replies any of my tweets to him, but I have no hard feelings to him. I'm still happy by just reading his tweets. Sometimes, it makes me laughs and sometimes it makes me cry. In the end, it's all good.

p/s: anyone who wants to follow him on twitter, here's the url. http://twitter.com/faliqfahmie

Mind your Grammar...

Today I read, again, the funniest joke ever. One of my besties post an interesting and hilarious status. It's actually in Malay language and to be honest even if I translated it, it won't be hilarious as it should be because then the meaning would be totally different. It's a language thing. But to those who can read Malay language, here it is.


Suami: Ayang, abang nak kahwin lain boleh?
Isteri : Boleh, tapi syaratnya kena belajar grammar English dulu.
Suami: Errr... Aaaa, Ok2.
Isteri : Satu tu "Singular"; dua atau lebih "Plural", kan?
Suami : Betul...
Isteri : One car sebagai singular, two cars pula sebagai plural. Apa bezanya?
Suami : Ohhh... tambah huruf "s" untuk yang plural tu kan?
Isteri : Betul tu. Sama juga la untuk abang..
Suami : Macam mana pula boleh sama?
Isteri : Satu isteri abang MAMPU, jika dua isteri dah jadi plural, maka abang

MAMPUS, tambah "s" je, kan? Lalu si suami pun membatalkan hasratnya untuk berkahwin lagi...har3..^^

p/s: I seriously doubt a guy would stop marrying another woman just because he heard this one. but if you look in a logical way, he probably would be dead(mampus) if he married another one. he has to provide and give financial, physical and emotional needs to both wives. I don;t think MOST men can cope with it.

It is what it is

Wow, who would have thought that 5 little words are the most powerful and devastating words I've ever heard.

How can someone give the most simple answer to something very complicated? Then again, we are talking about a guy here. For a guy everything can be simplified. They don't think too deep about anything. Like, if it happens, it happens right?

When he said that, I instantly regret we got back together a year ago. Remember when he promise to 'never leave me again no matter what' and 'I will make it happen so we will be together, I promise you that', I think he forgot to think about the part where we both are different in every single way.

Wish he thought of that 4 years ago. Wish... if... Oh well, there is no point of thinking what could or would happen. It already happen,  unfortunately. Regret. It is there. It won't go away trust me. But I try not to dwell on it too much. Life is too precious to waste on something too trivial.

Okay, trivial but a little bit matter to me. But I try not let it get to me. Just give me sometime. I'm sure I'll get over it.

Can't take my eyes of you.....

Yep, that is pretty much what happen. I think I am in love. With a capital 'L'. Okay, before you all go excited that I might find someone knew, it's not that. I was talking about Adam Levine!

To be honest, he's not my type and all but after I saw he performed at the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show, I was totally in awed! The song, the music, his movement, the models (yes, that count too!), totally makes him hot! And the models, W-O-W. You just have to see it to believe it.

Don't believe me how hot he (and the models) is? Check this one out yourself.

p/s: Orlando was like "Yeah, I f***k that everyday!"

Flashes before my eyes.....

Yes, that's pretty much what happen when you just got through a near death experience.

Today, when I was walking on the street, on my way back to my office, I was hit by a motorbike. Thank God, it was just  like a bump ( I didn't even fell down). If I was really hit hard, I would probably set flying across the street! I was shocked, stunned. I just stood still there for couple of seconds, until I realized that I was actually still in one piece. The biker, asked if I was alright and I told I was fine, and then I just walked away back to my office like it was nothing.

When I got to my office and sat down, I was totally shaking and finally feel a little numb on my arm and thigh.  I noticed I got few bruises around those areas. But other than that, no harm done. But I was still a bit shocked. I couldn't believe that just happened to me and live to tell the tale. How crazy and lucky was I?

I am really thankful to God that I am still alive. Some people said that if they went through something traumatic, they sometimes felt inspired and got a revelation or something. But I don't think I am one of those people. But I am glad I am not dead yet. There are so many things in this world that I want to do, experience. Given it is good or bad experience, I don't want to miss all of them. I think that what makes life interesting and meaningful and unique to a person. Sure I am gonna whine about alot of things, but I will accept all of them with an open heart and mind.

I believe everything happens for a reason. I always have been. Those words are like a mantra to me. It seems I have forgotten them for a while. That 'jolt' I got from the accident, reminded me of those words. Like it suddenly pop inside my head and make me realize how lucky I am to still be alive, living and breathing in this world.

Sometimes, you never know what you have until it is too late and it is time for me to embrace my fate. Whatever happen to me, I know there's a reason behind me. Either I want to take it as a setback or an opportunity, that is entirely up to me.


p/s: just because I'm gonna be positive, that doesn't mean I won't post any angst, sob blog though. It's in my blood. =P

Have you ever wonder..

What your ex partner is thinking?

Is thinking about you?

Did he miss you?

Did he ever truly loved you?

What is he doing?

Is he happy?

Or is he sad and in pain like I am?

Is he talking bad about you to his family and friends?

Did he regrets making the decision?

Is he holding back trying not to keep in touch with you like you do?

Did he already moved on to a new chapter?

Does he ever thinks of getting back together?

Is he happy without me?


These questions always swirling inside my head over and over again. As much as I hated all these longings for someone who left me without a glance looking back, I still do longing for him. I still care what he thinks of me. I still wanna know if he ever cared or loved me. I wanna know everything. But I also know talking with him again would be hard. Extremely. And besides, I might not like the answers he would gave me. If he told me that he regrets getting back together with me and it was a mistake (again), it would devastate me. Ahhh.... I'm crying again even when I tell myself, it's no use crying over someone who only treat you as a convenience.

Crying myself to sleep has been my companion for a week now. It wasn't as bad like the first and second break up, but it is still hard nonetheless. My head is hurting, my heart is aching, my body is shaking, and my confidence is crumbling. I know, I know it is only temporary but still it is hard to get back up and pick up the pieces on my own. Sure, I got my own friends to help me along the way, but initially it is my own private journey to go through. Whether I make it or break it, it is entirely up to me only. My friends can only go so far in helping me because in the end, I am the one who is calling the shots.

I don't know for sure how long or even when I will get over this heartbreak. It might take another few weeks, maybe months or perhaps years. I don't even pretend to know. But I can tell you this, someday, I will find my one true love. That time, he will never let me go no matter how hard the situation is. He won't run away and he will always stays here besides me, to comfort me and protect me from any harm. As I will do the same for him.

Always.

Big Happy Family

Well I wasn't really talking about like family family. I was more talking about close friends that I consider as family. I think I've mentioned them couple of times and I think I'll mention them again in case you guys who are reading this don't know any of them, these are my friends who I've known like my entire life. Some of them goes back for 20 years already. These are my close friends whom I considered as family. There are 5 of them. Sh. Amani, Rafidah, Azuraidah, Irniza (me), Zuraini and Eliza. Or we called ourselves SRAIZE. I know, awesome isn't it. (Hahahaha....)

True that most of them are married and one is engaged, about to be married next June, but it is comforting to know that they still have time for each other even though they are busy with their own families. Especially the one who has a baby.

Which is what I am about to share with each and everyone of you. My visit last weekend was to meet my besties. I haven't meet them since last September before one of our friend, Eliza a.k.a Eija left for Kyoto, Japan to further her studies. Anyways, I was ecstatic of how I am able to finally meet everybody (excluding Eija) after such a long time. Not to mention I will get to meet my nephews ( I know they are not my really my nephews but they are family).

First, I got to meet Miss (soon to be Mrs.) Sh. Amani, she's the one who picked me up from the bus terminal. Ahh....When I see her, I felt it in my chest a throbbing pain and my eyes were about to shed some tears. But I managed to hold it inside me. I don't know how I did it, but I was able to put a brave and smiley face. I keep telling myself that I am here to meet my besties to have a great and fun times.I don't want to spoil it with my sobbing and sad stories which pretty much she knows about them already. But after few hours, we finally touched the most sensitive story. My breakup. It was hard in telling the story and to relive it was much worst. But after talking to her and listen to her advises and her comfort words, it soothes me. Don't get me wrong, to heal a wounded heart will take a lifetime. But it helps knowing that she knows what I'm going through and have the right words to comfort me. It makes me smile a little.

Then I got to meet another one, Azuraidah a.k.a Im. She a whole lot fun to be with I tell ya. She's extremely funny, happy-go-lucky, witty, smiles a lot and a good listener. There is always something funny she wants to share or tell. Even when she is sick, badly, she still smiling and cracking joke here and there. She has seen numerous doctors and submit to several tests to know what's going on with her. Apparently she lacks on blood and her body is extremely fatigue. Figures, given how hard she works this year. Travelling every weeks and still have time to do chores at home. Even the strong one will succumb to that kind of pressure. When I first saw her, I can't even believe how pale she was. Not to mention there was something wrong with her face. And she told us, (me and Sh. Amani) that her face was half paralyzed! When she smiles, only the left side was curling upwards and her right eye was not moving even if she squinted her eyes or anything. Do you know how worried I was? I scolded her plenty of times when I told her to take plenty of rest and she needs a vacay. I care about her a lot and seeing her like that really breaks my heart. Not to mention I am an hour 1/2 away from her, makes me worried more. If I am close to her, I could see her often and watch over her in case anything happen. But still I am happy to see her again. I always laugh whenever I am around her.

 From Left: Azuraidah (Im) and Sh. Amani

 Yous truly, Me!

Me, Im and Sh. Amani @ The Terrace

Next day on Saturday, the 3 of us decided to visit our friend Rafida a.k.a Fida who just gave birth to a baby boy which she named, Imran Raha.

Imran Raha, 3.9 kgs

I am not sure what happen, but she can't give birth normally so she had to do the cesarean. When we saw her, she looked radiant with joy and happiness because of her bundle of joy but still look in pain and pale. Sh. Amani was happy playing with Imran, while I was more concerned for Fida to be honest. She looks so helpless. I want to help but I'm not sure where to begin. But it looks like she knows what she's doing so I'll leave her to her husband (Taha), to take care of her and Imran. In all, we had great time playing with Imran. He's so cute, with chubby cheeks and so full of hair! 

The next day, again we pay a visit to another friend of ours, Zuraini (Zue). I swear I haven't seen her in years. She's so busy with her work and I was away from home and last weekend was the first time we meet after such a long time. She also gave birth to a baby boy called Aqil Rizqin.

Aqil Rizqin

 He is sooooooo small! I was so scared when I touched him coz I'm scared I would break him or anything. Again,Sh.Amani was so ecstatic playing with him, always disturbing him sleeping. Not that he cares actually. He was sleeping the whole time. Anyways, that gives all 4 of us plenty of time to catch up. It was really nice to finally be able to talk to her again. Lots of questions, catching up, laughter. Ahhh.... it was very refreshing. Exactly what I needed. To be honest, I really do miss her a lot. Among all 6 of us, she is the only one I had a hard time contacting since she is always busy with her work and family. But I don't mind really. As long as I know she's okay and still remembers me, that's good enough.

In all, it was such a productive and interesting weekend. I got to forget my heart break for a while and spend really good time, laughing, cracking jokes, making fun of each other, teasing one another, got comforting words and memorable hugs from everyone. It won't mend my heart which already been broken into million of pieces but it did help patch them up a small bit. That already is a good progress. I have to thanks my friends for that.

What would I do without you guys? Love you guys always.

Hateful comments

OMG, why are you so fat? or

Wow, you are getting bigger every year. or

If you get any bigger, no man/ you husband would want you.

Seriously, people? What's with this hateful comment? Sure it could be true, but don't you know how to keep it to yourself? Even if you want to like, tell that person the truth and want them to lose a weight a little bit, I'm sure there is a better way to say it. If you think you can't find one, why don't you just shut up?

The reason I brought up this issue coz a friend of mine told me recently what her relatives told her when they see her at her sister's wedding. And she was devastated by those comments from her aunts and relatives and giving her unwanted stress. I feel for you, sistah!

I've been commented like this whole my life from my mum, my mum's friends, my brother, my brother's friends, relatives, my so called friends and even strangers. So, yea, that topic is very familiar to me. At the beginning, it was very very very stressful, I feel so demotivated about myself, no confidence, no self esteem and no respect for myself. It took a while for me be comfortable with my own body and now I'm practically happy with myself now. Truth to be told, I'm still low with my self esteem but I am comfortable with my body. Back then, I usually wear huge clothes and baggy jeans to cover myself but now I wear something more smaller to show my curves. True, I have a bit ( a bit?) of lump here and there but now I'm not that concern about it anymore. I will never flaunt it though (hahahaha....) but I don't mind anymore if I wear clothes or dresses that show my lump here and there. As long as it's a small lump, I don't mind showing it. Hahahaha....

But on serious note, these people should really watch out what they are saying. Don't they realize the damage they could have done to a person? Words can be hurtful, that is why you should always watch out what you say to people. Some people can take it easy, but most people can't. Like me, I take things hard if someone says something that could really hurt me. Not just emotionally but in a long run could hurt someone physically if they decide to do something drastic about it, like dieting that could lead to bulimia or worst anorexia.

Just remember, what you say will be remembered by that person for the rest of their lives. So, think before you say anything. Be wise and be alert. Remember, just like an old Malay saying goes, "terlajak perahu boleh diundur, terlajak kata, buruk padahnya'. Translation: "If you go too far with your boat, you can turn around; but once you have said something wrong, there is no turning back"...

p/s: I pretty much get over all those comments. It's not really worth my time anymore.